Finding Your Own “Secret Formula”of Success?
This reading is my shared opinion from the experience of other people around me and I myself. It is about insecurity from comparisons and standards of success, it may be suitable for you or may not. But I try to share what I can to help. So, let’s start:
You may find someone like this. A person who is always passionate doing something, he never runs out of energy and always devotes himself to achieve something. Or someone who seems capable enough to do something. And the results are shown by the approval of others, whether it is on their position, by their doings at school/works, by his achievements/salaries, or by their success.
(I used he/him to make it simpler to describe rather than giving the two-gender descriptions to passages such as “he/she” “him/her”, etc.)
On the other hand, it might feel… “Wow, I want to be like him.” “How to be like him?” “What is his secret to becoming like that?” Maybe you analyzed him or even talked to him about how he manages it. In everything that has been done, in the end you might feel small. Or the phrase “I’ve done that! But why I can’t be like him?”
Well… here is my answer: even though you have done the same thing as he did, the impact is very different. Why? Simple. It is because you are not him!
Comparing is tricky
Sometimes we miss this and this makes us rumble. We emphasize following people’s standard of success rather than focusing on ourselves. We try so hard to get the similar success then we consider ourselves as a failure as our conclusion. Then makes us want to quit/give up because “maybe, it is just not me.”
There is a quote by Albert Einstein which says that “Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.” And add the context in which I think many of you know this quote (by Albert Einstein too): “Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
We are too focused on how people do things and it may affect us to be small/insecure/unconfident. But look up for yourself! Do you have a similar value? Are you only focusing on the results and just being like him? Even you should ask this for yourself: are you the fish that currently trying to climb the tree?
We may lose ourselves when we compare ourselves to others. For clarity on of context, we may not do the “apple to apple” comparison properly. Well, to know that we are seeking for better it is good. And it is nice to have such awareness. But don’t forget that you are human too. It is okay if you are not in your best position at school/work right now. And it is cool if you don’t have a greater achievement/success like other people.
It might help if we can come up with a proper comparison methods that doesn’t focus on the result and make us insecure, but it might help us to grow and know we are moving forward.
Knowing yourself first is a better way of finding yourself better. This is whereabout we can start moving on to the important thing: your “secret formula.”
It is a journey
Finding your “secret formula” is the best way to put yourself that you are trying your best and you are processed enough. It doesn’t mean you are already enough to grow, but you are likely enjoy to follow on yourself to achieve your own goal, not others. It is not only “do and get”, but it is lifelong learning that we never come to the conclusion. As a circumstances change, so do we.
But if we ponder and begin to discover “what are my values” “what compel me to do something” “what exictes me the most” it might leads you to the journey. The journey that might help you to get the secret formula and be the better version of yourself. I suggest you should enjoy the process the most! Since it is not about focusing on the results, the secret formula can be found while you enjoy the process.
I don’t want to give more on how I found/how you should find it. I think everybody can find their secret formula on their own version. And it can be biased from me and it doesn’t “one size fits for all.” But here are my tips: Always eager to learn and relearn even if you are quite experienced in that field/area. Ask yourself why on doing things. Have a vision for your goal in life by listing them all one by one into practices little things. And try to explore things even if a little, do it consistently until you realize what it is means to you.
Feel free to response/DM personally if I can make the writing better. And I hope my sharing can help you to see more cleary and to have a “better” awareness. Cheers!
